But when Montecillo reached the section that asked for his ethnicity, he hesitated.
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On this week’s episode of the Reply All podcast, This American Life producer Stephanie Foo talks about the particular difficulty of online dating as an Asian woman. The images were of John and another woman, kissing. Just as Suzanne was clicking through the photos, messages meant for John popped up on the screen. She sent out a mass message to John’s female Asian Facebook friends telling them what she learned. He built up a cadre of several women — all Asian — and then he would get found out, they would all go their separate ways, and he would begin anew.
Suzanne texted John demanding he return home immediately. Suzanne discovered that her loving, loyal boyfriend had been dating multiple women simultaneously.
In the end, Stephanie decided it was easier to delete all of her online dating profiles than it was to date online, all the time wondering if she was matching with some guy who had messaged her because he had set his filter for only Asian women. As she says, "they have to come out from behind their screens.
They’ll actually have to look into my eyes and hold out their hands.
And that’s when they’ll find out that I have teeth.